Thought Provokers: 10/30/2024

Kids get disappointed on Halloween if they don’t get a good haul, and some adults get disappointed on Halloween because no kids visit them.

Someone, somewhere, has gotten their first menstrual cycle on Halloween. It was probably traumatizing.

Cocaine and Gillette razor blades cost too much to end up in some random kid’s Halloween candy.

Hardly anyone gets a trick on Halloween. Everyone just gives a treat.

October 1st feels more like Halloween than November 1st.

No company loves an abandoned strip mall building more than Spirit Halloween.

It's rare to see someone dressed as Santa Claus for Halloween.

The rich kids used to get store-bought Halloween costumes while the poor kids got homemade costumes. Nowadays, it’s the other way around.

There should be a website where you can sign up and swap your Halloween costume with another person every year to save yourself money.

That joke tape that says “Caution: Biohazard,” usually sold at Halloween, isn’t as funny as it once was.

We live in an era where adult female Halloween costumes are practically lingerie.

Halloween is when celebrities can go out and not be recognized by the public.

Buying Halloween candy as an adult is like paying your dues for all the years of free candy you took from people.

There is a limit to how much effort you are legally allowed to put into a police officer's Halloween costume.

Halloween is the only day of the Year you can trespass on someone’s property and make a non-negotiable demand.

The week after Halloween, when the candy is 50% off, is when adults go trick or treating.

Taco Bell is missing out on an opportunity to come out with a Chalupacabra for Halloween.

Someone should throw a Halloween party where everyone dresses like cops, so if it ever gets busted, there will be mass confusion.

No one likes your kids enough to give them free drugs for Halloween.

Somewhere out there, someone is eating your favorite Halloween candy not because they like it, but because it is all they have left.

If I put an empty bowl out on Halloween with a sign that says “Take one”, I’ll look like a good person and everyone will think someone just took all the candy.

The Nightmare Before Christmas is a Thanksgiving film. It begins Halloween night and ends Christmas Eve (not giving either holiday a full day).