Grumpy Talk on the Trail

I suppose it’s the human thing on a hiking trail to acknowledge one another when passing. But on a well-used trail, the same comments come up time and time again.

“Good Morning.” As an introvert I don’t understand why I have to say Good Morning to every member of a 30-person group. Nor does Good Afternoon roll off the tongue as nicely. Too many plosives and fricatives. Yesterday I got yelled at for not saying a cheery enough “Good Morning” to a passing hiker. I did not realize I was at a Downton Abbey garden party.

Then there’s the consoling “You’re Almost There” hello. For one thing, I am alm...