Go Ask Jo: 8/24/2022

Dear Jo,

I enter my address into Google Earth and I can see my house perfectly. But when I go outside, I can’t see myself - I can see the cars on Google Earth but not myself! I’ve even gone out with my laptop and tried to reflect something shiny up into the sky so that it can read my location. I don’t understand! Does this mean I don’t exist?

Questioning Google

Dear Questioning,

While Google maps tell us where things are, it definitely doesn’t tell us whether or not WE exist! Of course, you exist! You are using the app correctly, but not realizing that the app is a snapshot of time - not a live feed!

If you still have worries about your existence, might I suggest a bit of a reality check? Talk to a real human being instead of basing your reality on a phone app!

Signed, Jo

Dear Jo,

What is the phobia of chainsaws called?

Fearing the Buzz

Dear Buzz,

Common sense.

Signed, Jo

Dear Jo,

Today I was walking down the street and there was an ant on a puppy, so I stepped on the ant and killed it. A police officer gave me a very dirty look and so did a lot of other people around, so I’m wondering, it is illegal to kill an ant? I’m serious - this isn’t a joke. I just don’t understand why everyone was so upset!

Sincerely, Ant Killer

Dear Killer,

You. Stepped. On. A. Puppy.

Signed, Jo