Just Ask Georgia: 4/16/2025

GEORGIA, I have a question,

When my son Liam (17M) was born, I started saving for his college education. I wasn’t rich, but I saved a little each month so he wouldn’t struggle when ready. Over the years, I would joke with him, telling him, “If you don’t go to college, I’ll spend this on a trip to Europe to drink the best beer in the world.” He always laughed, rolling his eyes, knowing I was only half serious.

Tragically, Liam passed away in an accident just before his 18th birthday. The pain was unbearable. His mother (my ex-wife) and I were devastated. I couldn’t look at his room, his things, or even think about the future he never got to have. The money sat in the account untouched.

I remarried two years later. My wife, Emily (42F), has a son, Jason, who was 16 when we married. Jason and I maintained a friendly relationship but were not close friends. When he was about to graduate high school, Emily suggested we use Liam’s college fund for Jason.

I hesitated. That money had been for Liam, and giving it to someone else, even my stepson, was like erasing my son’s memory. I knew it was irrational, but grief is not rational. I thought about it for months. Then, one day, I remembered my joke with Liam.

So I did it. I took the money and booked a solo trip to Europe. I went to Germany, Belgium, and the Czech Republic, drank beer in historic breweries, visited beautiful cities, and allowed myself to live without the weight of mourning crushing me for the first time in years. I toasted Liam in every pub, remembering our jokes, his laughter, and the dreams we had.

When I returned, Emily was furious. She called me selfish, saying Jason could have used that money for his education. Her family agreed, calling me a horrible person. Even my ex-wife was horrified when she found out, saying Liam would have wanted his stepbrother to have the opportunity he didn’t have.

But I don’t know. It was never Jason’s money. It was Liam’s. And in a way, I spent it celebrating his life, not pretending it never existed. Was I wrong to do what I did?

REMEMBERING MY SON

Dear REMEMBERING,

Your story brought a tear to my eye. Too often, we don’t allow ourselves the time to grieve; too often, we try to gloss over the pain. I think what you did was absolutely fitting, and no one should pass any kind of judgment on you or your actions. Cheers to you and Jason!

With love, GEORGIA

Have a question for Georgia? Email her at whledger@gmail.com. Please note: this column is just for fun. No person, animal, or property has ever been harmed or in danger. Satire is “the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people’s stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.”